FromCrussiaWithLove…

Derby Girl. Feminist. Green Tea Drinker.

01 Oct 2011

My First Bout. Just Kidding! How about a broken leg instead?

So I made the team! I was getting my own jersey! I had my photo taken for the bout booklet! I was BOUTING! I had worked so hard for so long for this. Hours and hours of sweating and sore muscles and blisters and never being able to do anything with my other non-derby friends. But my reward would be worth it. I was going to pop my bout cherry in a home game in front of all my friends and family, with the group of girls who had become an indispensable part of my life, playing the sport that had literally become my world. I was so excited. I told everyone and anyone who would listen to come and watch. I watched DNN like my life depended on it. I spent hours trying to decide what my bout-fit would comprise of. What hilarious and witty statement would be on the back of my panties? What outrageous stockings would I wear? I was going insane from happiness.

And then, as tends to happen in life, the very thing that had become most important, was taken away from me. It was the week before my first bout and we had just started a practice scrimmage. It was the second jam, and I was jammer. It wasn’t terribly dramatic or exciting, but it did happen fast. I was on my first pass through the pack and somehow I tripped. I rolled my ankle out and fell on it with it stuck under me. I felt and heard on the way down several snaps and I knew instantly that something was seriously wrong. When I didn’t get up for a few seconds my coach blew the whistle for everyone to take a knee and he came over to me. I couldn’t move and my ankle was flopping about.  All I said was ‘fuck’. (Naughty of me! No swearing allowed on the track!) The ambulance was called and I waited, lying in the middle of the track. I felt vaguely bad for making scrimmage stop only two jams in, a week before a bout, but I could not move even an inch. My wife was at my head stroking my hair, another team mate who is also a nurse was telling me to breathe, and someone else was holding my hand. I believe they were trying to serenade me and joke about to cheer me up. It kinda worked. But to be honest I was devastated. My leg was hurting, but not as much as my heart. I knew I wouldn’t be bouting, or even skating, for a long time.

The ambulance finally came and gave me some happy gas. That’s when I started giggling. The rest of the night is a bit of a blur – I was given lots of drugs for the pain. X-rays, doctors, lying around, x-rays, surgeons and some more x-rays later I went into surgery to get a plate and 8 screws in my fibula, and 1 long screw through my ankle. After a fitful and painful overnight stay at hospital, I was sent home with a cast, crutches and a shit-load of drugs.

Once at home I was overwhelmed with get well messages and offers to make me cookies and dinner and for doing my laundry. My facebook page practically imploded from all the love I received – mainly from the girls in my derby team. They understood more than anyone else what I as going through, and the heart break and disappointment I was feeling.

This was a week ago. Tonight is the bout that was going to be my first. I didn’t even get to go because I am in too much pain and the pain killers make me drowsy and dizzy. I have just been told that our team won though! I am so happy for them, but at the same time I am literally heart broken. I have been crying all night. Hopefully things will get better soon. I know that I WILL be skating again soon and I WILL bout. I am just so devastated that it wasn’t tonight.

I won’t be walking for at least 10 weeks, and I won’t be skating until after then. I honestly don’t know how I am going to go not skating for that long. I am at my happiest when I am in skates, small pants, fishnets and my TCR league shirt skating with my derby family. I will still be at training though, helping out with calling out the drills or training the level 2′s. Whatever I can do to help and be involved. Hopefully 10 weeks will fly by if I spend them at derby. In the mean time I will work on this blog and maybe do some ‘introspective thinking’ or something. I’ll let you know how that goes…

Thanks for getting through that whinge-fest! Hopefully I can write some more positive posts soon! And I have lots more tips for freshies still to come!

Leave any comments below about any heart-breaking experiences you have had with injuries or similar in derby. How did you get through it? Are you stronger for it? Or did it just happen and you are still majorly depressed? Let me know!

Until next time derby dolls,

Crussian Doll xxx.

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25 Sep 2011

First Scrimmage – What…?

I was hopelessly frightened of my first scrimmage. I had no idea what or how or when or why. In theory I knew the rules. I knew how to skate, how to fall, how to stop, and to an extent how to block. But practicing all of these things in Fresh Meat is a completely different kettle of rollergirls to actual scrimmage. But even if I was so nervous and frightened of my first scrimmage, it actually went really well and I won most valuable player and a free slurpee voucher! So in the end I really had nothing to worry about. And neither do you!

Here are a few pointers that helped me through my first scrimmage, plus some things I wished I had have been told :)

Be mentally prepared. Think about it before you play. Don’t stress about it! But just think. Make a decision in your mind to try your very best and remain focused. Derby is a very mental sport and you need to learn how to develop your mental game and awareness.

Know your rules. This will be an extraordinary help if you are familiar with your rules! Knowing what you can and can’t do, how long you stay in the penalty box for, when it’s appropriate to skate clockwise on the track, what the ref signals mean, who can line up on the pivot line (hint: it’s the pivot) – all of this will help you to stay out of the box anymore than you need to. That said – I spent quite a bit of time in the box in my first scrimmage because even though I knew in my head what I could and could not do, it is a lot harder to translate that knowledge into action. Like, back blocking is REALLY easy to do, even if you know that you’re not meant to do it. Same with cutting the track – it’s just very easy to do it before you realise you have. Don’t worry about it too much, you WILL make mistakes and that’s okay! Basically all I am saying is that even a vague understanding of the rules will help a lot.

Be willing to try all positions. No one is expecting you to be amazing, or even good, at scrimmage on your first go. So you have nothing to lose by trying out all the positions. You will most likely be put as a blocker on the inside line, but if you get the chance to jam, do it! If you suck, awesome! You learned something! If you don’t suck, even better! Even try being pivot if you can. You will learn just how important the position of pivot is, and you will respect the good pivots on your team much, much more. This is pure learning and experience for you. Please stop worrying about sucking. Everyone on your team started off just like you, scared shitless in their first scrimmage. But every time you do it, it gets easier and you get better. True story!

Do what your team mates and coach tell you. Even better, ask “Where do you want me? What am I doing specifically in this jam?”

Don’t be hard on yourself. You will not be perfect in your first scrimmage. You will not be perfect in your third, or tenth, or thirtieth or one-hundreth scrimmage or bout. So this is good advice for all your derby career really. But especially for your first scrimmage. Don’t beat yourself up for that back block, or for letting the opposing jammer straight through the inside line, or for falling over and creating a massive pile of flailing limbs tumbling over you. You are learning! And all of the mistakes you make, are opportunities for you to do just that. And if anyone on your team becomes exasperated with you, try asking them what they were like in their first scrimmage. That will probably make them shut up.

Don’t sit out. Pretty simple. Don’t sit out if you have the opportunity to be on the track. Yes, you can learn a lot just by watching scrimmage and bouts in action, but save this for actually going to watch a bout, or watching bouts on DNN. When your league is practicing scrimmage, this is not the time to watch. For me, most of what I learned about actually playing derby came from, crazily enough, playing derby.

Positional block.  Unless you are a hip-checking prodigy, keep it nice and simple for your first scrimmage. Positional blocking is highly effective if done correctly, yet you are much less likely to lose your balance or trip over your skates than you are if you attempt a can-opener or a diving booty check. Practice blocking opponents and preventing them from getting past, by simply being in their way at all times. This will be far more impressive to your team than a hundred failed attempts at big hits.

Inside line. The inside line is the most crucial lane to defend. Jammers will almost always look for a way to get through the pack on the inside line, as it is the shortest and fastest way. So being a defending blocker on the inside line is one of the most important positions to play. It is also, however, one of the most straightforward. Get on the inside line. Stay on the inside line. Do not ever move from the inside line.

Get up! You are going to fall down a lot. It is inevitable, and the only thing you can do about it is to get up. Fast. Unless you are seriously injured, do not spend forever after falling over being all like “Ohhhhh noooooo, I fellll over! Oh man, that kinda hurt, now I have to get uppppp. Hummmppphhhh, getting upppp….”, because by the time you’re finished with all of that bull shit, the pack is already halfway around the track and you need to sprint to catch up with them. Derby is not about never falling over. Don’t ever be embarrassed about falling over. You spent weeks and weeks in Fresh Meat learning how to fall safely and quickly for a reason. Just get up. Bounce up if you can.

Get low! Get low, get low, get low, get low. Get. Low. Yep. That is all.


And most importantly, have fun! You’re awesome! You’re actually playing roller derby!

What was your first scrimmage like? Terrifying? Wonderful? Did you injure yourself? Or get lead jammer? Let me know!

Crussian Doll .xx.

  

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20 Sep 2011

Fresh Meat! – when you’re a rollergirl in the making.

So you’ve joined roller derby! Yay for you! You are already infinitely cooler, stronger and more attractive because of it. But being in Fresh Meat can be a little scary, despite, or maybe because of, the super badass-ness of derby. So here is some advice from me to help you survive Fresh Meat and be on your way to roller girl glory!

Be at every practice that you can. You will not learn without practice. Spend as much time as possible on your skates, and try to get as much as you can out of every training session. There is no point showing up, skating for 20 minutes, and then quitting because you have blisters. Skate, skate, skate, and you will improve dramatically. And FYI, everyone in your league has blisters. It is not an excuse.

Don’t worry too much about being best friends with all of the girls. That will come in time. Just focus on the skating first.

KNEE PADS! Buy decent knee pads as soon as you can. After my first training session I had massive bruises covering both of my kneecaps. I bought 187 knee pads that night online. Knee injuries are extremely common in roller derby, and you don’t want to start your derby experience with damaged knees.

Try and be involved in as many committee meetings, fundraisers, flyer drops and other volunteer activities that you can. You want to be known as someone who is there to truly help out the league and be a participating member, as opposed to someone who just wants to be an awsum rollergirl or who just wants an ego boost. You’ll also be considered for the team over someone else who never volunteers.

Read your rules. The earlier you start learning the rules, the better. Drill and skills that you are learning make much more sense if you can understand them in the whole scheme of roller derby. And when you eventually get to scrimmage, it will be exponentially easier if you know in which direction to skate and how many skater need to be on the track etc.

Watch matches on DNN. An easy and fun way to familiarise yourself with derby, the rules and the flow of the game is to watch as much of it as possible. You might not have access to real live bouts very often (but GO to them if you do!), so a good source of live action is on the derby website DNN.

Talk to the girls in you league. Ask them questions. They have the experience, and they are the girls who you will most likely be playing alongside one day. Glean as much information and as many tips from them as possible. Most will be more than happy to help, and believe me, there is nothing a derby girl loves more than talking about derby. Especially her own experiences with derby.

Start thinking about your name, but don’t make any hasty decisions. Take your time to come up with your name because while it’s not official, it’s pretty frowned upon to change your derby name once it’s registered. You need to make sure you love it and are not likely to stop loving it-  soon it will be on all your t-shirts and pants and you’ll probably get a tattoo of it as well. It also needs to be easy enough for other to pronounce and remember. And think about the appropriateness of it too. Would you be happy to have your kid sister cheer you on when your name is ‘Vaginal Dis-Charge # 69′? (I just made that up then, it my actually be someone’s name for all I know…)

Try and get fit. The rigours of learning to skate and the basic skills of derby will be so much easier on you and your body if you are moderately fit already. Also, you are much less likely to be injured if you are strong and flexible. Don’t assume that derby training is enough. You need to be doing cardio and strength outside of derby. Exercise everyday of you can. You are an ATHLETE now! Act like one.

That’s all from Crussian Doll, but here is some more advice from another very clever derby girl. I got inspiration for this post from a blog called ‘In case you were wondering why I am like this..’ (http://twinkletits.tumblr.com/) and one of her posts about Fresh Meat.  Here is her post in full:

My top 7 tips for fresh meat

1. Take off that garter-belt-tutu-thing and pay your fuckin’ dues. Lay track, keep score, haul water, stamp hands. There will be a time for semi-nudity and obnoxious self-promotion. And that time is after you’ve actually proven yourself on the track. Teams don’t draft rollergirls. Teams draft roller derby players.

2. You don’t always get drafted right away. Even if you do everything right, maybe you’re just not what a team needs. Maybe a team needs a jammer and you are clearly a blocker. Maybe you just need more time. Don’t throw a diva fit and don’t disappear. Ask if can help with reffing or NSO duties or whatever. Keep practicing and keep driving yourself. You can be awesome! But it doesn’t happen overnight.

3. Watch the game. Watch as many bouts online, on TV, or in person as you can. Have the rules on hand so you can check to see and familiarize yourself with all the penalties and procedures. Watch with a vet and ask questions about everything. If you get a penalty during practice or scrimmage, ask the ref about it afterward. You don’t sound stupid. It’s a very complicated game. Most the players I know (including myself) say the average amount of time it takes to really understand what you’re doing on the track is one year. One. Year. Of being on a team. Ask And listen all the time.

4. Wax on, wax off. Does a drill seem easy to you? Then you are being a lazy, sloppy, no count, time wasting, dumb bitch. The best skaters in the game do hundreds of laps and basics til they puke. Get lower, engage your core, add a power option. If anything is comfortable or easy you are not making the most of the drill.

5. Learn the difference between hurt and injured. Injured means you can’t skate. Broken bone, torn ligament, concussion, loss of limb. Don’t ever skate if your doctor tells you not to or if you are only 75% healed. Tell your coach and captains if there is anything wrong with you before hitting the track.  That said, DERBY FUCKING HURTS. You don’t get to stop or skip practice because you are “hurt.” Being sore, having a bruise the size of a skillet, a little sniffle, or a black eye are not excuses to stay home. Nobody wants to draft a player who is always too “hurt” to be there for her team.

6. Perfect your stops. You do not need a drill or a lot of space to work on stops. Whenever you have a few seconds alone work on stopping as quickly and as low as possible. T-stop with your left and your right skate, plow stop, hockey stop, backwards toe stop. Dragging a toe is an invitation for an opposing blocker to floor you and probably snap your ankle. Don’t ever, ever do it.

7. Derby skating is not session skating. There is never a time for coasting during roller derby. At any given time you should be actively speeding up or slowing down. Read that sentence again- it was a derby epiphany for me. When you are skating fast there is never a need for gliding. Speed does not come from wheels rolling; it comes from pushing off the edge of your wheel. Crossovers, duck walks, juking, choppy, running steps. Get it?

Alright! That’s really the end now. Learn something freshies? Do you feel better about derby now? Or do you feel more overwhelmed? I hope you feel better! Leave any comments or advice about your own fresh meat experience :)

From Crussia,

With love. xxx.

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18 Sep 2011

My First Derby Training Session, and Some Tips For Yours.

I walked into the huge shed, nervously glancing around. Girls in tiny pants and ripped fishnet stockings were skating around a coned track, or putting on their gear. I walked over to a table with one girl sitting at it, introduced myself and said “Hi, I’m here to join roller derby”.

I strapped on some hire skates, and pulled on my disastrously inadequate (not that I knew this at the time, but I was about to find out) knee pads, elbow pads and wrist guards. Sitting on a chair, with all my gear on, I practiced rolling my skates back and forth on the floor. “Oh God”, I thought, “I’m not even going to be able to stand up, let alone skate”.

But I did stand up. For about 3 seconds. Then I fell on my butt. So I stood up again. Then I fell on my knees. So I stood up again. Eventually I was able to skate slowly without flailing or falling. We learned how to fall safely on one knee and both knees. We learned how to do t-stops and sticky skating. I was even able to do jerky, hesitant, but obvious crossovers. By the end I was exhausted and sore; and I was in love.

That was a few months ago, and since then, my whole life has changed. I am a different person. I can do things that I never thought I would be able to. I have more confidence than I have ever had. I have passed all my skills and theory tests. I have made some friends that have become some of the most important people in my life. I have a derby wife! And it all started with that first training session.

Some tips for your first roller derby session:

1. Make sure you have the date, time and place right and know how to get there.

2. Contact the Fresh Meat coordinator, President, or Captain of the league beforehand or by the RSPV so they know you are coming.

3. Know what you need to bring. Some leagues will require you to already have skates, pads, helmet etc. Other leagues have these items available to hire and use. You need to find this out.

4. Bring WATER! Quite a bit. You will get very thirsty. This pretty much applies to every derby training session you will ever go to.

5. Wear comfortable clothing that is easy to move in and not flowy, too tight, too loose, low cut blah blah. It’s also a good idea to wear tights or stockings so you don’t get grazes or rink rash. A good choice is a pair or stretchy shorts like bike pants or running shorts or something, a T-shirt or singlet that is long enough and moderately tight fitting and stretchy, and tights/stockings. A sports bra is also a good idea. You will be falling and rolling and flailing around and you don’t want to be flashing your belly or boobs or crotch or bum. Unless you do want to, in which case wear whatever you want. Don’t worry about fancy socks or fishnets or tutus or small panties with witty writing on the back. You can experiment with all of that once you actually learn to skate.

6. Attempt everything, and don’t get discouraged if you find things difficult. If you haven’t skated in years, or ever, then this will feel strange! Your brain isn’t used to your feet being on wheels, and you need to learn how to skate just as you learned how to walk. Seriously, it WILL come with practice.

7. Talk to a few people, or don’t. Don’t make a big deal out of trying to make friends straight away. Believe me, friendships will develop inevitably and naturally if you continue going to training and being involved. It took me about a month to become comfortable with my little fresh meat group and become good friends with them – before then I was too preoccupied with my own skating and progress to make friends!

8. Have fun! Yes, this is a cliche, but derby is supposed to be fun. Don’t get caught up in the things you can’t do or how intimidating the girls might be. Be proud of yourself and your courage!

9. Eat carbs and protein afterwards to help with muscle repair. Drink LOTS of water.

10. Prepare to be very sore! Your butt and your quads and probably your wrists will be super sore! This is good! You’re growing some muscles! Ice them if you need to, but you can’t really escape being sore for the first few weeks at least. You will also get blisters on your feet. This is inevitable. After my first training session I had massive bruises covering my knees, my quads felt like they were ripping off my bone (‘lil bit dramatic, but whatever), and my wrists were were hurting from rubbish wrist guards. It got better though, and it will get better for you too, I promise!

11. And most importantly, GO to your first roller derby training session! It will change your life for the better.

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Feel free to comment below with your own experiences with your first derby training session :) Any horror stories? Any magical stories? Any stories at all!

From Crussia,

with love. xx.

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15 Sep 2011

Hello Roller Girls and wannabees!

So this is my first post. I have wanted to write a blog about roller derby ever since joining The Toowoomba City Rollers Fresh Meat in May this year, but I have just never had time, and procrastination is pretty much my life skill. What actually made me start this finally was an injury (I’ll talk about that later) a week before my first bout! I’m in a cast for 8 weeks, so I have plenty of time lying in my bed with a laptop – perfect blog writing conditions!

So basically, I want this blog to be mainly for girls just starting out with derby as a place to learn all the little things they will need to know. It will also document my own journey as a derby girl in the making. And any other stuff I feel like putting on it.

Happy reading and happy skating!

Crussian Doll.

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